Corporate politics

Why do people feel a need to be a brown noser? Don't people have a little bit more self respect than that??? I'm sure everyone out there knows of someone in their office, or worse yet, someone among their friends, who is a brown noser. This is the person who tries too hard to please their manager. This person can pretend to be your best friend, but will use any information garnered from you for their benefit. Ah yes, where would corporate America be without these wonderful creatures of the workplace????

Some of you might be wondering "How do you recognize this specimen?" Well, Bruingirl, as the expert in yet another poignant category of life, knows how:

1) Brown-noser (BN) starts to dress like the boss, whether it be a pearl necklace (get yer mind outta the gutter, kids) or French cuff dress shirts.
2) BN starts to enjoy all the same things as the boss - speedboats, triathlons, underage girls....
3) BN becomes a spy for the boss, narking on anybody that might hold a negative viewpoint about the evil corporation for whom they all work - Hitler-jugend anyone???
4) BN starts to talk and laugh like the boss, using the same words and demeanor.
5) BN walks around the office with an attitude of someone who is more important than he/she really is in the great scheme of things.
6) BN goes out to lunch with boss and claims it as a "travel & expense", failing to understand that T&E are used on clients.
7) BN gets a new position created for him/her in the office so that he/she can justify his/her existence at the company.
8) BN is the first one during a meeting to raise his/her hand to offer an explanation on a question that is posted by boss.
9) BN makes a point to sit in front of the conference room for every meeting.
10) BN has the same bathroom schedule as the boss, going to the bathroom whenever boss goes.

That, my friends, is the profile of the brown noser that secretly (or openly) resides in all of our offices!