Candy dishes

I feel like a trick-or-treater in my office. There are candy dishes everywhere with goodies from chocolates to life savers. Candy dishes seem to be an ubiquitous staple in every white collar office. They are no different than the stapler or sticky note or inbox. It doesn't matter what time of year it is. There are candy dishes filled with chocolates and candies throughout the year. It's no wonder that Americans are getting fatter. We sit on our asses all day and munch our way through mini chocolate bars. Hey, they're tiny! How much damage can they do? Well, if you're eating about 5-7 of the "mini" chocolates, that comes out to quite a bit now, doesn't it??

Well, what purpose do these little trinkets serve? Why do they exist? Who created the tradition of having candy dishes at one's desk? Why more women than men who engage in this activity? No one will ever know, but here's some interesting tid-bits from Fastcompany.com:

"The survey found that while 26% of candy dish owners share office gossip over sweet treats at the candy dish, dish distractions aren't an issue [Thank God, snark added by FC]. Candy dish owners believe they are more organized (46% versus 32% of non-candy dish owners), hard working (63% of candy dish owners consider themselves hard working, versus 37% of their non-candy dish counterparts [Are we on another planet?, FC commentary again], creative (64% versus 46% without a candy dish in the office) and more likely to be team leaders (55% versus 40% of those without a candy dish in the office).
"The delicious data further revealed that those who dish out candy on a regular basus are most likely to be female (69%), Republican (41%), married (56%) and twice as likely as non-candy dish owners to say they were extremely satisfied with their current job [In other words, borderline psychotic suburban women stuck in loveless marriages on a middling path to nowhere, interpretation added]."
"The survey also found that there are many 'bonuses' to being a candy dish owner--not only are candy dish owners perceived to be more friendly (41%), more candy dish owners also received a financial bonus in the past year (43%) than non-candy dish owners (37%). While we know of no company that requires candy dishes as part of a job description [My God! Could this be right!?], sixty percent of survey respondents with candy dishes also reported that they received a raise last year, while 49% of non candy-dish owners reported getting a raise over the same period."

Socialism?

Senator Byron Dorgan from N. Dakota thinks that the big oil companies need to give their "windfall profits" back to the public. He thinks the government should impose a special excise tax on oil companies.

I am no happier about the price I'm paying at the pump to fill up my car, but to impose a special excise tax on these companies that represent capitalism at its finest is absolutely ridiculous! I saw an interview on Dorgan this morning and he thinks that the oil companies are making too much money off the general public. Who is to determine how much is too much? I don't know about you, but isn't that the whole PURPOSE of capitalism? Dorgan claims to support capitalism, but this tax he supports is sounding more and more like socialism.

As Americans, we are so spoiled with paying such astronomically low gas prices (have you been to Europe?) that we feel the need to point the finger at someone else to take the responsibility and "ease our pain". In Dorgan's case, it's the oil companies. Well, let's see, the average cost of a gallon of gas is about $3.20. That comes out to $0.20/cup. How much does your cup of coffee from Starbucks cost? It certainly puts things into perspective, doesn't it?

Why just end at the oil companies? Let's attack Starbucks, Microsoft, Dell, Apple, Toyota, GE, Disney, Pfizer, Unilever, and every other publicly (both US and international) held company that actually turns a profit. Let's place an excise tax on their "windfall profits" so that we can re-distribute the wealth. I don't know about you, but that seems like a slippery slope to a place called socialism.

I think Adam Smith may be turning over in his grave.

Ambulance sirens

I am on the 6th floor of a building and I can still hear the ambulance sirens from miles away. I think the walls here are too thin. What do you think?

It's funny to watch people on the street when they hear a siren. There are those who understand exactly what they are supposed to do and move their cars to the right hand side of the road. Then, there are those who just stop. That's it. Just stop exactly where they are. Then, there are the really intelligent ones. They keep driving, maybe a bit slower, but still driving. Maybe they'll even apply the break as they try to contemplate what they should do.

It's stressful enough having to rush to an accident scene. It isn't any easier when you are dealing with people who are not very intelligent and don't understand anything.

You're Getting Old When....

1) You know of more babies being born than people getting married.
2) You have more friends getting divorced than getting married.
3) You are no longer eligible for the U.S. military draft.
4) Midnight is a "late night" out.
5) Your back starts to hurt.
6) Your friends would rather "work on the house" than watch football on a Sunday afternoon.
7) Your parents are looking into long-term care options.
8) Parents start dying.
9) You are more concerned about saving for retirement than saving for a vacation.
10) You don't know when school starts in the fall.

What can you add to this list?

Busy Busy Bee

The sun creeps up into the skies as she climbs out of bed to face the challenges of yet another day. Driving into the office, her eyes dart constantly between the rear-view mirror and the road ahead....just to make sure there are no men in blue uniform in hiding. They can be rather vicious with people trying to get to work early in the morning. They know people are in a rush. There is no better time to wait in a speed trap than during rush hour.

She nods a hello to the security guards on her way into the building and waits patiently as the elevator pulls up to the 6th floor of one of the only "high-rise" buildings in the Southbay surburbia. The phone is flashing as if it was its way of greeting her. The computer happily beeps as she boots it on. She scans headline after headline of stories, catching up on all the business data that takes place within a short 12hr period. ABC Company merges with XYZ Company. 123 Co's CEO is caught in a money-laundering scam. The Al Qaeda are threatening world domination again. Storms are wrecking lives. The market marches onward and upward.

Phones ringing. Paperwork needs signing. Proposals. Emails. Mindless banter over football with colleagues. Scheduling. The 12 hour day is gone before she knows it. The sun is setting and casting a orangish-red hue into her office. The flurry of activity has long since died down. Her "to-do" list has dramatically shortened, but obviously not enough. She prepares for yet another day. The lights go off.

Seasonal Ball Shavers

In this day and age, it is appropriate for both men and women to groom all areas of their bodies. When I say all areas....I mean ALL areas. Some are more meticulous than others. Some prefer the "au natural" look. Still others like to synchronize it with the changing of seasons. These are the "seasonal ball shavers".

The seasonal ball shaver obviously likes the look and enjoys the feel of having his balls shaved. As much as he enjoys this, he dislikes the entire process through which he must endure in order to reach the end goal. This is why his grooming process changes with the seasons. When it's cold out, it is more comforting to have an extra layer of protection from the elements. When it's warm out, less is always the preferred route.

It seems to me that most girls prefer their men to be "au natural" unless he has a hairy back/ass. Then, it's all about the laser procedures and weekly wax appointments. So, guys must be shaving their balls for themselves and not for the ladies. What do you all think? What are your thoughts on shaven balls?

Helping the Victims

Damn that Hurricane Katrina! Here are some sites through which you can help out the victims out there in LA, MI, and AL. BTW, what pisses me off more than anything are the people who are trying to benefit from this tragedy, i.e. THE LOOTERS!!! What the hell is wrong with them??? Do they have no conscience? That's a blog for another day.....

The Greater Los Angeles American Red Cross(monetary donations only)
Phone: (213) 739-5267 Address: 2700 Wilshire Boulevard Los Angeles, CA 90057 http://www.redcrossla.org/index.php

Greater Los Angeles United Way(monetary donations only)
Phone: (213) 630-2100 Address: 523 West Sixth Street Los Angeles, CA 90014
http://www.unitedwayla.org/index.html

The Orange County Chapter of the American Red Cross(monetary donations only)
Phone: 800.435.7669 Address: P.O. Box 11364, Santa Ana, CA 92711
www.oc-redcross.org

Orange County United Way(monetary donations only)
Phone: 800.272.4630Address: United Way of America, P.O. Box 630568, Baltimore, MD 21263-0568
www.unitedway.org

Giving Children of Hope(accepting items of need: cases of water, hygiene products, sunscreen, canned goods, batteries, baby diapers & formula, chainsaws, generators, extension cords)Phone: 714.523.4454 Address: 8332 Commonwealth Ave., Buena Park, CA 90621
www.gchope.org

United Methodist Committee on Relief(accepting monetary donations and flood relief goods)Phone: 800.554.8583Address: UMCOR P.O. Box 9068, New York, NY 10087-9068www.gbgm-umc.org

Catholic Charities(monetary donations only)
Phone: 800.919.9338Address: Catholic Charities USA, Hurricane Katrina, P.O. Box 25168, Alexandria, VA 2213-9788
www.catholiccharitiesusa.org

Salvation Army(monetary donations only, send checks w/ "Disaster Relief" written in the memo)
Phone: 800.725.2769Address: P.O. Box 4857, Jackson, MS 39296-4857
http://www.salvationarmy.org/